Gorilla Ice Ice Baby

Last weekend I played the role of awesome, supportive husband when I ignored my own race goals and my marathon training schedule and ran the Denver Half Marathon with my wife, pacing her and catering to her every need. This weekend was payback as I sent her all over town looking for items to complete my Gorilla Ice costume for the Denver Gorilla Run and then told her that I didn’t even like most of them. I then proceeded to get gorilla fur all over the house (seriously, that thing was shedding like a yeti vacationing in the Caribbean), and finally made her drag two tired little boys all around Denver so they could cheer for me.

The race was roughly 3.6 miles long and I had decided that I would try to take it easy on this run, mostly because I would be wearing a gorilla suit, but also because I was still hoping to get my 15 mile long run in. I ended up finishing somewhere around 36:22 with an average pace just north of 10 minute miles. It was a little slower than I had hoped for, but the effort that I put forth felt more like I had been running a 5K close to an all out pace. I kept my mask on for the first mile and then alternated between perching it on top of my head and pulling it back down over my face when I saw an official photographer. I didn’t feel at all guilty for not wearing the mask the whole way because there were some people that didn’t even wear it for the first tenth of a mile while others ran with their gorilla costumes stripped down to their waists. It was hot. The temperature was in the 70s and I was so hot that my teeth were even sweating.

At one point in the race we were forced to stop before crossing a busy street that had not been closed to traffic. There were a couple of traffic cops directing traffic and they stopped a group of us for at least a minute, normally I would have been upset about this, but this was a fun run for charity and at the time the forced break was welcome.

All in all it was a fun event. I managed to make a complete fool of myself as you will see in the video below and I got to meet up with Simon from RunColo who took 2nd place overall. If you want to know how it feels to be competitive then I recommend reading his account of the race. Congrats Simon!

The video below is me dressed up as Gorilla Ice dancing to, what else, Ice Ice Baby. I figured if I was going to be Gorilla Ice then I should at least try some dance moves. Steve in a Speedo has on a couple of occasions posted videos of himself dancing as the Grim Reaper and he inspired me to give it a try. Perhaps in the future I’ll challenge Steve to a virtual dance off (challenging him to a foot race is out of the question, he’s fast) because the only thing lamer than a dance off, is a virtual dance off between two bloggers.

Crank up the volume and bask in the beautiful sounds of Vanilla Ice accompanied by the eye-gouge-inducing dance moves of Gorilla Ice. A couple of things to watch for: At the 46 second mark you can see me very nearly roll my right ankle, that would have been an embarrassing way to injure myself. At the 2:30 mark you’ll see Simon cruise by in a Hawaiian shirt and an orange headband.

High quality version available at YouTube.

Gorilla Suits are Hot

This Saturday is the Denver Gorilla Run and I’ve already received my gorilla suit. I tried it on the other night and it was hot just standing around in it. How am I ever going to run a 5.6K race in that thing? Also, 5.6K? Obviously I knew that it was going to be hot running in a gorilla suit, but I had no idea that it would be THAT hot. What is it made out of real gorilla fur? I guess it’s probably not, because that might conflict with the whole “save the gorillas” theme of the race. So if they’re going to use synthetic gorilla fur anyway then why can’t they make it out of some dry-fit, wicking material so that it’s nice and cool? Have we as a society not yet become technologically advanced enough to make a wicking gorilla suit? I think science needs to step it up a little here, maybe even pull some people off that whole curing cancer thing so that this can happen.

Also, when I try to raise my arms in the air (and wave ‘em all around like I just don’t care) the suit kind of gives me a wedgie. You’re probably thinking “well just do like McCain and don’t raise your arms in the air,” and that’s good advice but you’ve clearly forgotten this picture of my running style, and I’m using ‘style’ in the loosest possible sense of the word. Between the sweating and the wedgieing it’s not going to be a good day to be Vanilla’s underwear, and man oh man how I hope that you were eating lunch when I graced you with that visual.

I’m still trying to scrape together some items to make this costume less gorilla and more “Gorilla Ice” because that would be cool, and not at all geeky or nerdy despite what other people might say. I’m not sure yet if it’s going to happen or not, but I guess you’ll just have to wait until Monday when I have some pictures to post with my race report, and maybe, if you’re lucky, a video too.

The Denver Gorilla Run

Ever since my wife signed me up for the Denver Gorilla Run I’ve been getting e-mails about the plight of gorillas and the things that I can do to help. Isn’t it enough that I dropped 150 bones to run in a gorilla costume and that I’m drawing attention to it by blogging about it? I sure hope so because that’s pretty much all the kind-heartedness that a self-absorbed humanitarian like me can muster. Why can’t it be enough for me to just draw attention to the problems and then hope that others will step up and deal with them? Consider yourselves officially ‘put on notice’ that there are only 723 Mountain Gorillas alive today, now go do something about it. You can start by visiting my donation page and making a donation to save the gorillas. Not only is it tax deductible, but you’d also be helping me out because the person who raises the most money wins a prize, and me winning a prize is the real cause to rally around here.

In these trying times when the value of your home is plummeting and the price of gas is so high it has the munchies, just try to remember that there are gorillas who are less fortunate than you. Sure they don’t have gas to buy, or a mortgage to pay but they’re more endangered than your 401K, although if we’re honest that’s getting closer to being a toss-up. But just think, if every one of my readers gave a dollar then we’d be able to see how many readers I have and find out just how accurate SiteMeter is, and if you don’t want to support the gorillas or help me win the highest fundraiser prize then do it so that we can figure out how accurate SiteMeter is.

Finally, if you can’t afford to donate or just don’t feel like it (you cold, heartless git) then you can help me win the prize for most creative gorilla costume by leaving your suggestions in the comments. Right now, the leader in the clubhouse is “Gorilla Ice” meaning that I would dress up like Vanilla Ice and then do a lot of 90s dance moves, which could be detrimental to my marathon training and possibly devastating to my street cred. It’s your chance to suggest ways for me to further humiliate myself, I expect full participation in the comments.

Personal Running Log - August 2008

I’m beginning to realize that I have a tendency to miss some runs after a race, and it doesn’t seem to matter if it’s a 5K or a half marathon. You can see below that after the Georgetown Half Marathon it took me a week to get back out there and run again, and do you think that I’ve gone running since the Skirt Chaser 5K on Saturday? Nope, sure haven’t. If only my wife would have bought me some dedication for my birthday.

Instead of dedication, I got an entry into the Denver Gorilla Run, which I’m really excited about. I was considering this race a few months ago, which some of you may remember, but hopefully not too many of you because I’m just going to repost what I already posted. A quote from a previous entry is a quick and easy lazy way to fill a blog post. Here’s what I wrote on June 18th:

The next race up for consideration is the Denver Gorilla Run, those of you who voted that I should do the slip ‘n’ slide (90% of you) will like this one because you have to run dressed as a Gorilla. It’s a 5.6K but other than that I don’t know much about it. Apparently the proceeds go to the Mountain Gorilla Conservation Fund to benefit the Mountain Gorillas, probably by building them new schools and providing them text books or something. Anyway, they give you a Gorilla suit and you get to keep it! I’ve always wanted to own my own gorilla suit so if I participate in this race it will be one more thing that I can cross off my bucket list. Prizes are awarded for Highest Fundraising Gorilla, First to Finish, Furthest Traveled Gorilla and Most Creative Gorilla costume (i.e. what you add to your monkey suit to make it stand out). I’m thinking The Vanilla Gorilla costume is a shoe-in for first place. Shoes! I bet the proceeds go towards new shoes for the gorillas.

The most likely hindrance to me participating in this event is the high entry fee ($150). I guess that’s attributable to the gorilla suits that they give out and the rising cost of gorilla text books. The best thing about this race, other than it being a good excuse to keep calling everyone a “damned dirty ape,” is that I have never run a 5.6K (who has?) which means that it would be a PR by default. Anytime you can guarantee yourself a PR just by completing an event, that’s a good thing.

Date	Route	Type	Distance	Time	Pace
8/30/2008	Misc	Long	8 Mi	1:18:50	9:52
8/28/2008	7 Miles Out & Back	Tempo	7 Mi	1:04:35	9:14
8/26/2008	5 Miles Out & Back	Crappy	5 Mi	48:48	9:46
8/21/2008	5 Miles Out & Back	Tempo	5 Mi	42:57	8:36
8/19/2008	5 Miles Out & Back	Intervals (4x800)	5 Mi	43:59	8:48
8/16/2008	7 Miles Out & Back	Easy	7 Mi	1:06:53	9:34
8/9/2008	Georgetown Half	Race	13.1 Mi	1:56:45	8:55
8/6/2008	Treadmill	Tempo	4 Mi	35:49	8:58
8/4/2008	Track	Intervals (4x400)	4 Mi	35:29	8:53
8/2/2008	6 Mile Loop	Long	6 Mi	52:41	8:47
8/1/2008	5 Miles Out & Back	Tempo	5 Mi	44:03	8:49
Totals: Distance: 69.1 miles Total Time: 10:30:49