Things I Missed

By now you’ve realized that I only posted once between June 2nd and December 19th and that was to tell you to piss off so I’m not sure that you were all too enamored with that post and I’m not really proud of it either. The really disappointing part though is that you didn’t get to hear my opinions on the many things that happened in the wonderful world of running during those 6 months. Some of you have suggested in the comments on the last post that I should get down on my knees and beg forgiveness or partake in a little groveling but that’s just not my style. What I will do for you is acknowledge that I know how tough it must have been to go through these things without my guiding wisdom and I’ll even go so far as to admit that I missed being able to smother you with my thoughts on these subjects. What follows is a heartily abridged list of things that I would have totally written about had I still been actively posting.

• The Boston Marathon sold out in 8 hours and then some whackjob from the WSJ generated a bunch of page hits from the running blog community when he wrote an article about how women had it too easy. Incidentally this is the easiest way to get yourself in trouble with a woman. An alternative way to get yourself in trouble with a woman is to ignore them when they start talking over the football game that you were watching when clearly they were in the wrong for interrupting even though it was during a commercial break, but sometimes the commercials are mesmerizing and loud and ... holy crap I think she’s talking to me again I better start paying attent... oh good the game’s back.
• One of my favorite writers, Kristina, FINALLY managed to BQ (it’s about time) so belated congrats to her.
• Viper FINALLY managed to break the 4 hour marathon mark (also about time) so begrudging congrats to him.
• The Denver Half Marathon was .14 miles too long - I missed an opportunity to use my ‘morons’ tag :( so sad.
• Two words: Sperm Shoes! A few more words: Some company intentionally put a little swimmer on the side of their shoes as the logo! It’s like they were begging me to come out of blogging retirement and write about their shoes. Oh what fun I would have had with those babies. *rimshot* Why did none of you take this on and post about it? Note: I did not read any of your blogs while I was on sabbatical so I have no idea if you posted about it but I just always assume that you let me down, it’s what makes me such a great dad.
• Several celebrities were spotted running; that’s more sexy pictures that I missed out on posting.
• I PR’d a half marathon, even after making a casketload of mistakes.
• I missed a lot of runs, I complained about a lot of things and my family had to bear the brunt of it because I had no other outlet. My family begged me to start blogging again, I ignored them even though I was starting to feel the urge to post again. Then I was contacted by an advertiser who wanted to pay me for a link, but only if I was going to start posting again. Ta da! Posting again! It’s such a heartwarming tale.