Apparently there is a company called Sheddable Shell that sells tear away marathon pants and jackets. They’ll keep you warm when you’re standing in the starting corral on those chilly mornings and make you look hot when you tear them off like a Chippendale dancer. I NEED some of these pants! The question that I have is whether you can put the pants back together again once they’ve been torn away because I’d like to practice tearing them away before race day. I want to get really good at it so that when I do it on race day in front of crowd it’s sure to be a show stopper.
The website says that the jackets can be customized but what about the pants? I’d like it to say “POW!” or “BAM!” over the crotch to help me get my message across, and maybe have my URL across the butt. That way whoever finds the pants can make their way back to Half-Fast and see pictures of the handsome devil that shed his pants at mile 2 and maybe some video of me shedding the pants set to Marvin Gaye.
I would also like to offer some advice to whoever is in charge of the marketing effort for Sheddable Shell. Why no videos of the tear away pants being torn away? There’s so much potential for viral videos there. You could have videos of hot sculpted runners tearing away their pants to reveal their toned legs or videos of runners tearing away their pants and falling down as they try to do it without stopping running. Then to really summit the mountain of viral marketing you could have a blooper reel of sexy runners ripping their pants off and oops... they forgot to put on anything underneath! We’d tastefully blur that out of course but maybe you could even make a little extra dough on the side selling the un-edited version of the blooper reel. If I’ve learned anything about the internets, and I’d like to think I have, it’s that these are the kind of videos that go viral and get you tons of free publicity. As soon as I get myself a pair of these awesome tear-away pants I plan on making lots and lots of videos. Hmmmm... perhaps I should work on getting rid of this “weighted vest” before I shoot my videos.
Anyway, they probably don’t need to advertise at all now since I’ve mentioned the tear-away pants on Half-Fast and enlightened literally dozens of people to this awesome new product. Perhaps instead of spending all that money on advertising they could send me a free pair of the pants. Also if they’re reading this I’d like a pair of the pants for my wife too... not for running but for something else I’ve been wanting to try. I’ve said too much haven’t I?
I saw these at Chicago back in '09 but you don't need to go to all the trouble to order these when you can just as easily go to the local second hand store, pick up some cheap and ugly track pants! Ghetto rig them by slicing them up the sides and affixing a strip of duct tape at the hip, knee and ankle. Voila! Sheddable shell. I've done this a few times now and it works just great!
ReplyDeleteYou sold me on them for me and my wife. Are you getting commission?
ReplyDeleteYou really won't need to put them back together again since, once you rip them off and drop them by the side of the road, you'll never see them again. They'll become 'off the rack' for the local bums. But I suspect there are a lot of bums walking around with Half-Fast on their ass anyhow.
ReplyDeleteHow's this for retarded. At first I was reading the company's name with the emphasis on the wrong syllable, as Shed-DABle Shells. That could be a song. "Shed-DABle Dable doo! Shed-DABle Dable Don't!" Please inform the marketing representatives that I've created a jingle for them. They won't mind that I've mispronounced the name, will they?
ReplyDeleteI have actually bought and used these! I used them in my very first marathon. The pants tore away quite nicely, and I am sure all the runners around me were pleasantly surprised by my awesomeness when my gabs were exposed. I ended up wearing my little paper jacket though throughout the entire race (who knew it would snow in November in Philly?), which was quite handy at the Mile 22 port-o-potty as there was no toilet paper and I ended up tearing pieces off my "jacket." true story!!
ReplyDeleteWith my luck, I'd fall on my face trying to rip them off.
ReplyDeleteI do like the idea of wearing your own toilet paper, though.
With my luck, I'd fall on my face trying to rip them off.
ReplyDeleteI do like the idea of wearing your own toilet paper, though.
With my luck, I'd fall on my face trying to rip them off.
ReplyDeleteI do like the idea of wearing your own toilet paper, though.
With my luck, I'd fall on my face trying to rip them off.
ReplyDeleteI do like the idea of wearing your own toilet paper, though.
You're right! It would really be a good idea to have demo videos ripping off those velcros! :D
ReplyDeleteHAHHAHAHA, I'm not a runner, but i'd love a pair for dramatic effect.
ReplyDeleteI've seen these at expos, but usually just prefer to use the (free) heatsheet from my last marathon, which I just unwrap from around my body and throw away.
ReplyDeleteAlso, did you know that your other blog about your kids was featured in the book The Huffington Post Guide to Blogging as an example of a great title that is catchy and memorable? I used to love when you were posting there too.
The potential for falling gives me pause and slows me down (puns intended). Whatever you decide, peace and all good things for you in running and in life.
ReplyDeleteDiane
i still vote for the one dollar sweats from a thrift store, but that's just my two cents. preferably half-ripped to ease in the sexy rip-off part of the process...
ReplyDeleteI'm appreciate your writing style.Please keep on working hard.^^
ReplyDelete