Weekend Splits

Weekend Splits is my recap of things that I found interesting or humorous over the past week. If you have a submission for the weekend splits e-mail me.

How not to pack your supplements and energy drink when you travel to your next race.

Scott over at A Trail Runner’s Blog retells ultra runner Rick Gaston’s story of his attempt to run 100 mile race and then smuggle a several kilos of sports drink through customs in Sheridan, Wyoming. I guess the challenge of running a 100 mile race wasn't exciting enough for Rick (ultra runner-slash-drug-mule for the Colombian cartel) so he decided to spice things up a bit.

The ESPYs will be on TV Sunday night and you should watch them because Dean Karnazes is going to win one. I know this because; 1) I can see the future and 2) It has already been reported on various other blogs. One of those is true. See here and here for more info. I will be surprised if Dean gets much face time on the ESPYs as I'm sure that ESPN will spend most of their time on which criminal/baby-making-machine player will win the NFL Player of the Year, but congrats to Dean anyway. UPDATE: I was right (naturally), ESPN did not even mention Dean in the also-receiving-awards-tonight blurb. Updated 7-16.

Chocolate Runner's Blog gives us an Ode to an anchovy. I don't like anchovies but I do like chocolate. Actually, I've never tried anchovies but I'm still pretty sure I don't like them, I do like the poem though.

Marcy over at I Signed Up For This?!? claims that running is like a bad boyfriend. I'll have to take her word for it because I've never had or been a bad boyfriend, I married the only girl I ever dated and we're in the middle of living happily ever after.

Big thanks to Team Little Guy who mentioned me in their blog a couple of weeks ago. Go and give these guys some support and encouragement because at some point they're going to realize that they've signed up for a 208 mile race and then they will really need your encouragement and maybe also to be talked in from the ledge.

Also thanks to Just One More Mile who linked back to Half-Fast at the tail end of a post, if you’re not reading her blog daily then you’re missing out.

Running or Jogging: The Final Word on a Tired Debate

If you've spent any time around any running blogs or message boards then you've probably heard some version of the debate about the difference between being a runner or a jogger. Today's post will be my opinion on the matter or as I prefer to call it; The Definitive Answer.

The catalyst for this debate within the running community recently has been the Pearl Izumi 'we are not joggers' ad campaign which counter's Reebok's 'run easy' campaign. Chances are that if you're an elite or seasoned runner you were inspired by the 'we are not joggers' ads and if you are a slower or newer runner you were probably offended by it.

The ad paints joggers in a negative light and runners as elitist snobs, neither of which is true. Sure there are some elite runners out there who think themselves better than you and I, and let's be honest they ARE better than you or I, but only when it comes to running. And just because they are better than me at running doesn't give them the right to look down their noses at me. I mean, you don't see me looking down my nose at them because I'm a better blogger than they are. Seriously, have you ever read an elite runner's blog? BO - RING!

So far as I can tell, this dichotomy only occurs in running. The golf pro's at my local course don't try to tell me that I'm not playing golf just because I hit the ball into the wrong fairway every other hole. Sure they have some colorful names reserved for me, and they think I'm a bad golfer but they still concede the fact that I'm playing golf. If I play golf while wearing my iPod or ride in a cart instead of walking, or smoke a cigar while I'm playing it doesn't mean I'm not playing golf. Likewise, just because you are a slow runner doesn't mean that you are not running, as Pearl Izumi would appear to claim. You are still participating in the same sport or activity of running.

I for one am not going to tell someone who is giving everything they've got to crank out a 36:45 minute 5K that they were not running. I don't care how slow you are or that you have to listen to your iPod to get motivated, or that you run on a treadmill, or that you need walk breaks, you're running. You might not be as good as some people or as fast, but it doesn't change the definition of what you're doing.

Of course if I ever get to the point where I'm running sub 6 minute miles in marathons then I will delete all evidence of this post and pompously pronounce my superiority over all of you lame 'joggers'.

Incidentally, the ad campaign was absolutely genius. Had you ever heard of Pearl Izumi before these ads came out? Do you think we'd all be discussing them this much if they had gone with a mellow ad campaign? Sure they upset some people who are swearing that they'll never own their shoes but that will all blow over, and in 6 months a brand new runner will stand in a sporting goods store and look at a pair of Pearl Izumi's and think to himself "hey, these were marketed to elite runners, they must be great shoes" and then he'll buy the shoes and torment them by never letting them be any faster than 10 minute miles.

For the record, I consider myself a runner. A runner who's not as fast as he'd like to be, and a runner who occasionally jogs but a runner nonetheless. Personally I think Dr. George Sheehan said it best when he said that "the difference between a jogger and a runner is an entry blank."

It seems like every idiot with a blog is weighing in on this debate and I'm no different, but here are three that I enjoyed: Beyond Madison Avenue, Adrants and DaneGer Zone.

My 1st FIRST Workout

Intervals. Right off the bat. How is it that little miss runner pants' initial workout on her half marathon training plan was an easy recovery run, and mine is speedwork? I'm beginning to think I picked the wrong plan and I've only been doing it for a day.

To be honest it was actually pretty easy. I warmed up with a couple easy miles and then did 4 x 400 meter intervals in 2:00 minutes each with 2 minute recovery jogs in between and finished with a cool down mile. I felt good. I actually felt like I could have done the intervals a little faster and maybe I will next time if I'm still feeling this good. Oooh, look at me, my workout was too easy. Yes, I realize that I'm sounding like the chipper guy in your office who shows up early with the go-go attitude and wishes all the tired, hungover employees a "HAPPY MONDAY" as they try to down their first cup of coffee. Don't hate me because I'm fast... Because I'm not.

It occurs to me that I didn't actually post my training schedule in my post discussing it, further proving my brilliance, but here it is now:

Monday - Speedwork/Interval Training
Tuesday - Indoor Soccer (I'm counting this as cross training)
Wednesday - Tempo Run
Thursday - Cross Training/Weights
Friday - Off Day (Party Time! P - A - R - T - whY? Because I gotta!)
Saturday - Long Run
Sunday - Off or Cross Training/Weights

For the next three weeks I have a prior commitment on Mondays so speedwork will be moved to Wednesday, tempo runs will be Thursday, and cross training will just have to suffer. Prior commitment, I love to throw that term around. Doesn't it sound like I have something so important that I'm doing, negotiating the cessation of hostilities in the Middle East. I assure you it's nothing that grandiose.

Be sure to check back here tomorrow as I plan on weighing in on the hotly debated, highly controversial runner vs. jogger debate.

Don’t Give Up, Don’t Ever Give Up

This isn't directly related to running but it is a great inspirational speech by the late Jim Valvano. If this speech doesn't inspire you then you're probably the worlds only living heart donor. If you have 10 minutes of free time, which you probably do since you're online reading a running blog, then I suggest that you check it out.



This was brought to my attention today while listening to ESPN radio. They are doing their annual auction today for the V Foundation for Cancer Research where you can bid on a number of different items.

I have my first FIRST workout tonight (see previous post), a 4x400 speedwork session and I think I'm going to watch this video again before start, or maybe I'll even do it on the treadmill and loop the video.

My New Training Schedule

I haven't had a training plan since I finished the Bolder Boulder 10K back in May, I thought about it once but apparently it's not the thought that counts, at least not according to this second chin that I seem to have acquired. I decided to go with the half marathon training plan put together by the Furman Institute of Running and Scientific Training (FIRST). Something tells me that they didn't just name themselves and then coincidentally notice that their acronym was FIRST. Their original name was probably Furman Athletic Training and Teaching Institute but then someone realized that they'd be known as FATTI.

The FIRST plan is a great plan for me because there are only 3 runs a week which means that there are 4 non-running days a week. Huzzah! This fits in nicely with my hectic schedule of watching TV 4 nights a week and generally being a couch potato, also I play indoor soccer one night a week and softball one night a week so I immediately liked the idea of quality miles over quantity of miles.

The FIRST plan is a 10 week program and since the Denver Half Marathon is in 14 weeks I'm going to start the program and then jump back to the beginning and start over in 4 weeks. Long Runs are at 9:52 minute per mile pace, Tempo Runs are at a 9:07 pace and Speedwork is to be done as follows: 400s in 2:01, 800s in 4:08, and 1600s in 8:37. According to FATTI's calculations this training schedule will get me across the finish line in 2:02:42 so perhaps with a little race day adrenaline I can get down to a sub 2 hour half marathon. You can read more about the FIRST plan here.

Weekend Splits – One Day Early

Weekend Splits is my recap of things that I found interesting or humorous over the past week. If you have a submission for the weekend splits e-mail me.

I've been off work this week, which means that I've been doing more exciting fun things in real life and have spent less time sitting bored in my office to post to my blog or find interesting links for the Weekend Splits. To make it up to you, you're getting the Weekend Splits a day early.

This guy's really fast.

At last someone finds a good use for these signs that tell you how fast you're travelling. Let's face it unless the speedometer in your car is not working those are just there for a second opinion and when you ask for a second opinion it usually costs you more money and isn't any better than the first opinion. Your tax dollars at work folks.

If you're looking for some humorous reading about running you should check out the list of articles that the Running Blogfather compiled from The Onion. My favorite is 6000 Runners Fail to Discover Cure for Breast Cancer.

Finally, Half-Fast has been rated PG. Some material may not be suitable interesting for children. To be honest I'm a little disappointed. I thought I was a little cooler than that, I mean, even Wild Hogs got a PG-13 rating and I thought that it was pretty tame. The rating was based on the appearance of the word 'dead' twice and the appearance of the word 'knife' once. I can't for the life of me remember using those words. Enjoy the weekend!

Happy Independence Day!

If you're reading this blog from somewhere other than the good ol' US of A you may not have cared that today is July 4th but here in the home of the Big Mac and the Whopper we love the fourth of July. You see on the fourth of July we don't have to go to work, we grill burgers on the barbeque and then wash them down with watermelon and apple pie. We shoot explosives up into the night sky and 'oooh' and 'aaah' at them. We sing America The Beautiful, and The Star Spangled Banner, little girls wear red, white and blue ribbons in their pigtails and elderly women who haven't thought about our Sovereign Lord since the depression don t-shirts that are emblazoned with the flag and the slogan "God Bless America." US flags are hung outside of every fourth home in suburbia or every other home if you're in the Deep South, and everything that can be bought under the sun comes in red, white and blue today. Radio stations all over the country will be playing Born In The USA by The Boss, TV show news anchors will wear flag lapel pins and a few of the crazier ones will even wear kooky flag ties. Cable television stations will smother us with patriotic movies and I will genuinely get goosebumps during Independence Day when President Bill Pullman declares "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!" But most importantly, there is absolutely no running on the fourth of July, except maybe to catch a Frisbee or a football. In fact, I've often heard people say "these colors don't run" usually with a thick southern accent and I think that they're really trying to say no running on the fourth of July.

So, to all my fellow American's out there, have a happy and safe fourth of July. To all my British readers out there: THHHPPPPBBBTT!!! (Blowing Raspberry). No taxation without representation! Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

Today's Inspirational Quote

"Workouts are like brushing my teeth; I don't think about them, I just do
them. The decision has already been made." - Patti Sue Plumer, U.S.
Olympian

If I brushed my teeth at all regularly then this would probably be a great analogy. In order to be more accurate for my purposes I'll just replace 'brushing my teeth' with 'taking my morning leak' because that decision has definitely been made, sometimes I don't even really wake up for it. You too can change the quote to be more appropriate for how you view your workouts.

Runners: A Menace to Society

Ponch and Jon were too busy fighting serious crimes to ticket a jogger.

Christine Valdivieso was surprised last month when a motorcycle cop pulled her over. She was surprised because she was out for a Sunday morning run and despite the fact that she was well within compliance of the posted speed limit, she was running in the bike lane and that is a crime. Valdivieso tried to talk the officer into letting her off with a warning, but he wasn't fooled by the silver-tongued devil and wrote up the ticket anyway. You just can't believe what these criminals will tell you to get out of a ticket.

The truly sad thing about this whole ordeal is that Christine Valdivieso, was allowed to go free after receiving the ticket, while thieves who are probably just trying to feed their families are locked up. No jail time at all for this woman! This thug is out there somewhere roaming the streets and free to terrorize cyclists at will by running in their bike paths! I'll tell you one thing; it scares me the kind of world that my kids will grow up in. Fortunately we have true American heroes like the officer in the story to serve and protect us.

I don't know how cops manage to keep their cool and composure in the face of such devastating crimes against humanity. For crying out loud, what kind of deranged criminal, hopped up on who-knows-what runs in the bike lane? If I was a cop, and I saw a perp running in the bike lane, I'd have immediately radioed for backup and then begun beating the villain into submission. You can't be too careful these days.

For the record I don't personally condone running in the bike lane or any other criminal behavior. Link to my informer.

Personal Running Log - June 2007

Date	Route	Type	Distance	Time	Pace
6/28/2007	6 Mile Loop	Easy	6 Mi	57:28	9:35
6/26/2007	Home Treadmill	Tempo	4 Mi	38:23	9:36
6/24/2007	8 Miles Out & Back	Long	8 Mi	1:23:00	10:23
6/21/2007	6 Mile Loop	Tempo	6 Mi	59:53	9:59
6/16/2007	Misc Route	Long	4.36 Mi	42:48	9:49
6/13/2007	Other Treadmill	Easy	3.6 Mi	33:00	9:10
6/11/2007	4 Miles Out & Back	Easy	4 Mi	40:13	10:04
6/6/2007	Misc Route	Easy	6 Mi	59:47	9:58
Totals: Distance: 42.0 miles Total Time: 6:54:32

Personal Running Log for June, 2007. I'd rather be closer to 80 miles than 40, but I've been doing a lot of 'Mental Training' lately.