I’m Quiiting Running

It’s time for me to quit running. It’s not that I don’t still love to run because I do, it’s just that I’ve taken up a new pastime that is occupying all my spare time. I am no longer able to make the time to squeeze in any of my training runs and to be honest I don’t miss them at all. Don’t worry, my new hobby is a totally healthy way to replace intervals and long runs, it’s a little something called the Wii:

My brother-in-law gave us a Wii this past weekend. My boys have so much fun playing his Wii that he thought they’d like to have their own. It was a nice idea, but he clearly didn’t realize that they would be unable to wrestle the controls away from their father. After nearly 5 years of parenthood I’m finally starting to reap some benefits from it; the boys have cool toys that I can play with.

So I am sorry to tell you all that I no longer have time to run, what with all the Wii-ing I’ll be doing. I almost missed my long run entirely this past weekend and only managed to squeeze it in on Sunday night when my wife forced me to take a Wii break. But I don’t imagine that I’ll have too many more forced Wii breaks because my wiife is starting to come over to the dark side now too.

Before you know it the dishes will be piled up in the sink, I’ll be a no-show at work and we’ll be ebaying the kids toys to pay for new Wii games and cheap healthcare. We’re fixing to go down hard in our new addiction and Wii don’t even care. Perhaps I’ll take up smoking too while I’m at it, I hear that smoking helps you lose weight.

I’d love to tell you more but it’s my turn at Wii bowling so I gotta’ run, but not in the physical activity sense of the word, more in the screen-gazing, comatose, where-did-the-day-go, forgot-we-had-kids-to-feed sense of the word.

I’ve got a fever and the only prescription for it is more Wii.