It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

Despite arriving at the starting corrals mere minutes before the starting gun fired, I meandered through the crowds with all the urgency of the Maytag repair man. I was nervous on the inside but I refused to let it show, figuring that my exterior Joe Cool attitude would override my nerves, or at the very least cause my exterior Joe Plumber to hike up his shorts a little. I elbowed my way into the starting corrals and we started walking towards the start. The plan was to run the first 10 miles at a 10 minute pace, run the second 10 miles at a 9:45 pace and finish the final 10K at a 9:30 pace, but I was well aware that I might slow down as the race wore on instead of speeding up.

Five minutes after the gun souned I reached the starting line and started out at a 10 minute pace. The sky was clear, the terrain was flat and I was surprised to find myself enjoying the run. I smiled at the thought that I was running a marathon, I was actually doing it. Over the first 10 miles there wasn’t much to report except a guy running in cargo shorts and a polo shirt, needless to say I passed him but not before I snapped a picture of him (right). I also saw a guy wearing a shirt that said “Since my lame family is not here please yell ‘Go Jeff!’” which made me laugh.

I hit mile 10 feeling good, feeling refreshed and I started to drop my pace down to the 9:45 range. Somewhere around mile 14 I made the transition from working to keep my pace in check to working to maintain my pace. Candis and the boys were waiting for me just past the mile 15 marker, I stopped for a good luck kiss, some gels and quick application of bodyglide to my sweaty undercarriage (applied by me, not Candis. She was supportive, but not that supportive).

The real low point of the race came shortly after my pit stop. Mile 16 was longer than Gone With The Wind. My legs started to get tired, my head wanted to call it quits and I began seriously debating just taking a DNF. I slowed to a walk for this internal struggle. I called Candis and she told me to get going, she read me some of the comments that you were all leaving on her updates and I somehow managed to start running again. I struggled through mile 16 and was struggling through mile 17 when R. Kelly’s I Believe came up on my playlist. It was the boost I needed. I was running again, I was even running a sub 10 minute pace again.

At mile 21 I felt my pace starting to slow, I knew I was going to have to use Nitmos’ war of posts approach to the remaining miles and I cursed him for entering my thoughts during a marathon, and for being right, and for existing. I walked through all the water stops from mile 21 through the end, I stopped occasionally to stretch my quads because they were starting to get really tight, but each time I stopped I managed to start shuffling my feet forwards again.

My kids were at the final turn before the finish line, I gave them both a high five and ran to the finish. I even had enough energy left for a little Wizzard of Oz heel kick as I crossed the finish line (video and pictures to come later). It was over. All I felt was relief. I was relieved that it was over, I was relieved that I didn’t stop at mile 16. My official time is posted as 4:31:06, which is a PR since this is my first marathon. Here’s a quick recap of my race goals as originally posted here, and my splits. I’ll have more about the race and meeting up with Razz, including more pictures and video in the coming days. Thanks to all of you who read this demented little blog for encouraging me and supporting me, especially to those of you who left comments during the race, you all mean more to me than I’ll ever let on. Thanks.

Original Goals

1. Start the marathon. - CHECK!
2. Finish the marathon. - CHECK!
3. Finish the marathon in an upright position. - CHECK!
4. Finish the marathon with a time under 4 hours 30 minutes. - Close, I’m going to give myself a Semi-Check!
5. Finish the marathon with a time under 4 hours 15 minutes. - Nope.
6. Finish the marathon with a smile on my face. - CHECK!
7. Finish the marathon with a time under 4 hours. - Hahahahahahahah, nope.
8. Qualify for Boston - requires a time of 3:10:59 (my computer audibly chuckled when I wrote that). - Nope.
9. Set a new marathon world record - requires a time of 2:03:58 or better. - Nope.
10. Take it easy and enjoy myself. - Surprisingly, CHECK!

Splits

Mile 1 10:11 Mile 2 10:00 Mile 3 10:08 Mile 4 9:56 Mile 5 10:23 (Pee Break) Mile 6 9:43 Mile 7 9:49 Mile 8 9:50 Mile 9 9:58 Mile 10 9:53

Mile 11 9:43 Mile 12 9:38 Mile 13 9:48 Mile 14 10:07 (Pee Break) Mile 15 9:46 Mile 16 11:02 Mile 17 10:33 Mile 18 9:58 Mile 19 9:49 Mile 20 9:56

Mile 21 10:54 Mile 22 11:57 Mile 23 10:30 Mile 24 12:00 Mile 25 11:25 Mile 26 11:53